Day 5

My main focus right now as far as detox goes seems to be worrying about May 25, the day I give up caffeine.  I'm planning tactics to wean myself off of the substance starting next week.  I think I will drink tea only next week, and then decaf coffee for the first couple of days of the non-caffeine experience.  My real habit is with coffee, so after the first few decaf days, I think I'll try to switch to herbal tea.  I want to see if I can give up even the false comfort of decaf.  I am more attached to coffee and caffeinated tea than I am to alcohol, I think, as far as the comfort factor goes.  

Healthwise, I can't really tell a huge difference after a 5 days without alcohol.  I think maybe I sleep a little bit better.  Also, I sometimes get a bloated feeling that I haven't had in a while (though I also get that once a month as well).

A lot of my curiosity about a life without booze stems from some work I did with a healer in California a little over a year ago.  He is a medical intuitive who could work over the phone and he was helping me with horrendous chronic back pain (which was alleviated thanks to him, a chiropractor, an angelic physical therapist named Sunshine, and a cortisone shot).  In one of our sessions, he asked me if I had been drinking the day before.  I had in fact gotten completely (though accidently) shitfaced at an impromptu Thanksgiving dinner held by my very good friend.  I was so weighted down with the toxins from this that he could feel them all the way in Boston (of course, this is kind of what he does).  He told me that I shouldn't drink alcohol, that it was bad for my particular body chemistry.  He said that he didn't give this advice to everyone, that in fact a lot of people can drink as much as they want and aren't affected by it.  But he said that it was poison for me, and I knew when he said it that it was true.  Not just because there is alcoholism in my family or because I'm thin or because alcohol is "bad."  I just knew it at a gut level, have always known it somehow.  And yet here I am today, still drinking (though not on this particular day). I do envision a life someday with no alcohol in it.  I just wish that certain kinds of beer weren't so yummy.